Barbie was out one night having fun with her girlfriends at Bike Mikes Bar when another close friend of hers (with a heavier and loaded wallet these days) dropped in; he was the one they were waiting for to buy them more drinks before they could relocate to another hanging out spot, preferably Legends or Panamera Bar.
Aaron walked in with a woman who at first sight, Barbie thought was his mum only to be shocked when he introduced to her as his latest catch. She looked more senior to him.
“Abi! Aaron got a 1959 sangoma mu-summer blesser straight outta Cape Town.” Barbie texted in the WhatsApp group. She and her girlfriends we’re observing a cross-generational relationship case right before their eyes.
In plain English, cross-generational relationships (or what most campusers call blessers) are something-for-something sexual affairs between women and men who have a significant difference in age. These relationships are rare, and, in most cases, taken disapprovingly.
When Aaron got the notification on his phone, he excused himself and went to the washroom and fought back in the WhatsApp group to explain the reasons he fell in love with the older woman.
“She is Miss Independent. You campus babes are too materialistic. If it is not a car, you constantly pester us to buy so we can drop you in Kikoni, Akamwesi Hostel, Sundowners Bar or wherever you want to go. You always demand for cash to visit all posh places in KLA. But, my latest catch makes her own money and lives at her own place. Basically all I have to do is love her and be loved, die!” says Aaron.
But is Aaron right?
When we passed this to our SAUTIplus Ssenga, she challenged Aaron’s stand. She noted that older partners are more interested in sex, in exchange for money, before they get bored and move on to the next desperate catch.
“These days, all that young people want is money. A boy like Aaron for example, without money can hardly convince a beautiful girl to date her because she wishes to date a man who will take her to Kyadondo or buy her a car. But what Aaron doesn’t know is that the old woman will also sacrifice anything to get him into bed, maybe even pass STI infections to him and then disappear,” Ssenga explains.
“Cross generational relationships are not advisable most times. Fine we have seen Hollywood stars dating cougars and sugar daddies like Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey, R. Kelly and the late Aaliyah, Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake among others. But in Africa specifically Uganda, it highly exposes teens to sexually transmitted infections, HIV/Aids and sexual violence. Younger partners have no negotiating power with older partners during sex, which ends in having unprotected sex most times.” Ssenga concludes.
Over the years, cross-generational relationships have increased in number. Moreover, despite the controversies cited, this seems to be the next trend in love affairs, assuming intense efforts are not put into place.