5 weird excuses guys use to avoid condoms

“I know I should’ve used a condom, but he/she had game and was just so hot/amazing/cool/sexy/famous/out of my league that I didn’t want to risk ruining the moment.”

Raise up your hand if you know anyone who said something similar like that.

Let’s take a moment of silence to see what this means, shall we? So basically, what’s being said here is that you didn’t want to risk ruining the moment by insisting the guy wears a condom, but you were totally down with risking your entire life, health and future.

Like what the hell? Who does that?

And oh please, don’t start dropping those “he/she looks fine” lines based on how they look. Fam the reality is, the hotter they are, the more sexual opportunity they are most likely to have. What that REALLY means, is more times they got “lucky” and managed to vibe someone into having unprotected sex after using pulling their adorable stants and playing the oh-please-but-i-really-like-you card. Gerraarraahia!

Let’s look at some of these excuses.

1. “But I love you.”

   Okay your love is noted. But you know that our blind love for things can kill us like this couple which died while taking a selfie, this guy who died trying to play video games three days straight,the babe who died while texting, dancing and even chocolate kills. True stories. Whether you love me or not, there’s no way I’m having sex with you without a condom because I love myself enough to care about my body and my health. Conversation OVER.

2. “But am allergic to condoms.

   Oh boy, we thought we all belong to Kingdom Animalia. So when did you turn to fungus to start having allergies? Maybe if you spent as much time educating yourself about sexual health as you did for learning how to play PokeMon Go, we wouldn’t need to have this conversation. Read our lips, Hercules: No condom, no sex.

3. “None of the other girls I’ve been with insisted on condoms. You must be hiding something”

   Well yes, as a matter of fact, I do have a few things I’m not telling you about (like, oh I don’t know, dignity, intelligence and self-respect for a start!). Comparing me to other women you’ve been intimate with and questioning my sexual health status simply because I am sexually responsible and practice safe sex isn’t really my idea of foreplay. I’m glad I’ve seen your true character. Thank you, I’m leaving now.

4. “Condoms smell bad”

   Hold up, condoms are meant for smoking or served on a plate? If God wanted nostrils to be on our private parts, that’s where we would be breathing from. Do you even know that we have flavoured condoms which smell like your favorite chocolate? Try out Trust, Rough Riders and Mood condoms. Thank us later

5. “I have one boyfriend/girlfriend so I am sorted”

   So does that mean that you put a padlock on their bodies when they are moving out of the room? Be honest. Don’t wait to get the shock of your life when it turns out that your partner has STIs. Get your stuff together.

Practicing sexual health protection measures doesn’t suggest promiscuity, but it does scream self-love and respect. By not standing up and asserting your right to practice safe sex to the men out there who insist upon challenging responsible sexual health practices, you are actually contributing to the problem. You’re making it extra difficult for the women who ARE confident and unashamed to stand their sexual ground.

*dropbs mic*